Who Do You Think You Are? A Question Worth Answering

There’s a question that many of us have heard at some point in our lives—sometimes spoken outright, sometimes lurking in the shadows of our thoughts:

Who do you think you are?

It’s a question that can feel like an accusation. A challenge. A way to put us in our place. And for many women physicians, it’s a question that has shaped how we move through the world.

Maybe you heard it growing up when you expressed an opinion that someone else didn’t want to hear. Maybe it showed up in medical training, when you were made to feel small for not knowing enough, not working hard enough, not being enough. Or maybe it lingers now, in the back of your mind, whispering that you should be able to handle everything—that the fact that you’re struggling means you’re the problem.

But here’s the truth: You are not the problem.

The real problem is a healthcare system that demands more than is humanly possible. A system that expects you to work the equivalent of 26.7 hours a day just to meet the needs of your patients. A system that relies on your self-sacrifice and then punishes you for needing rest.

And yet, so many of us have internalized the belief that we’re failing. That if we were just more efficient, more disciplined, more dedicated, we could somehow make it all work.

But that’s a lie.

So I invite you to sit with this question in a different way:

🔹 Who do you think you are—when you are rested, nourished, and free from the weight of exhaustion?
🔹 Who do you think you are—when you aren’t trying to meet impossible expectations?
🔹 Who do you think you are—when you allow yourself to want something different?

Because the version of you that exists outside of burnout, outside of self-doubt, outside of survival mode—that version of you is still here. And she deserves more.

The path to reclaiming yourself isn’t always clear, and it certainly isn’t easy. But it begins with recognizing that you are worth the effort. And that you don’t have to do it alone.

If this resonates with you, I encourage you to take the first step—whether that’s journaling about this question, having a conversation with someone who gets it, or exploring a new possibility for yourself.

And if you’re looking for a space to do this work alongside other women physicians, Unbound: Women Physicians Reclaiming Their Lives will be opening for enrollment in March.

Because who you are—really, truly—is worth fighting for.